These conversations actually happened in my house.
Honestly, I can’t make this stuff up…..
Second Born Son: Having a girlfriend is expensive.
Me: How do you know this?
SBS: Everybody knows this!
Me: (Ok, I’ll indulge him) Hmm. So how is having a girlfriend expensive?
SBS: You have to buy the gifts for their birthday, for Christmas, Valentine’s Day. So I’ve figured it out.
Me: Oh, have you?
SBS: Yup. I’m going to break up with them. Right before their birthday or Christmas or Valentine’s day.
Me: Oh, you think that’s going to work?
SBS: Yup. Then I won’t have to buy them any presents.
Me: Well, I think that’s only going to work for you once or twice, then the word is going to get out.
SBS: What word?
Me: That you are a lousy boyfriend!
Followed by this gem…
First Born Son: I think I’ve figured out the Valentine’s Day thing.
Me: What’s that?
FBS: It’s not what you do on the 14th that counts…
Me: Ok… (I’ve got some hope here!)
FBS: Ya, it’s what you do on the 15th! And besides, everything is on sale then!
I can see I have my work cut out for me!